Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
There are two people having sex in one of the showers right now trying to silence their orgasm sounds and failing. Thank you coed bathrooms.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
boys just don't understand what they're missing out on.
he's missing out on my boobs looking marvelous this evening.
I promise your sink was clogged before I threw up in it.
Randomize
