$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
You picked the wrong day to call in sick. She's wearing the librarian glasses today.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Just to be safe, you should be prepared to jump out of a second story window
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
Randomize
