If you win this game of words with friends, ill suck you off for 30 minutes. No lie.
I cant last that long. Do i get the rollover minutes?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
our new exchange student wants to hear all about America's greatest politician, "Oprah." it's gonna be a long fucking day
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
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until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Its official the day you get back into town we are having a going away to jail party for me. My last wish before prison is to shit faced drunk with you, get into a fist fight, and then cuddle up and fall asleep. Just like old times <3
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Note to self don't give these guys your number. I've seen more dick tonight than a proctologist sees his whole career
Oh it's tea and biscuits for everyone. An possibly pink eye
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
I think I may have just hit a new slutty low! ..... Just purchased the Costco pack of condoms... $9.99/48 pack = amazing deal! The judgement when I bust out the value pack = priceless!!!
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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