Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
I didn't mean to leave you there I just didn't know him well enough to throw up in his bathroom.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
I tipped the hot bartender my entire wallet. Again.
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Its completely acceptable to go naked under my graduation gown right?
Some ppl might frown upon it but theyre prudes
your ability to divide cases of beer among any given group of people equally was missed.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
And on a positive note i found a list that i made in 3rd grade titled "what to do if you want a guy to like you"
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
Did you happen to find the other half of my bra last night?
Randomize
