We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I'm celebrating tres de junio so if you can help me find some sombreros ill be grateful. Also, today in 1992 Aborigines were granted rights to their land so I might need some boomerangs.
youre just mad i got the high score on the breathalyzer
We almost died tonight..we almost die every night. but tonight was the closest by far
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
I'm handcuffed to your bathroom sink. Save me.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
It's getting to the point where my ability to get dick pix during the work day is impressing even me. Take that, adulthood!
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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