this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
My dad just drunkly made a toast in front of my entire extended family "to my daughter the recent and sucessful college and to my son the drunken whore-monger"
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I just shotgunned a beer and my lipstic didnt BUDGE. MERICUHH
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
he's drunk and referred to his shoes as foot condoms
honestly, fuck you guys. i'm gonna get drunk by myself
Randomize
