Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
I took a bird feeder and filled it with alka-seltzer. Can you say fireworks?
We need to either drink and not go to waffle house or go to waffle house and not drink. I need to know which is causing these shits.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
I'm really proud of myself for not blacking out yet this weekend!
It's a Thursday.
I opened my door to find him standing there with vodka, McDonalds, a smile and a hard-on. Of course I let him in.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Woke up with a 22 year old with the number for a different girl written on my stomach, almost 30 can suck my dick I still got this shit
I'll screw just about anything, but I draw the line there
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Booze, boobs, blunts and batman. dude, I'm livin' the life.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize
