IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
zippers are such a cool invention
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
29 Petty People Reveal The Shallow Reasons They Turned Someone Down
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
21 Horribly Evil Pranks To Play On Your Drunk Friends
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
So apparently being drunk at work isn't allowed.. who knew?