Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
Thru out the entire phone conversation I went from thinking: he's making a gay come-on, to he's trying to sell me drugs, before realizing he was offering me a job with an internet company. Things are gonna be awkward in class this week.
It's like, I'm the official vagina for that DJ group
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
Weed is now completely legal in Colorado and Washington. I repeat weed is now legal! I'm putting a deposit down on a house as we speak.
ROADTRIP.
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
I just hope the day something happens to me my phone just dies, like literally died and will never turn on ever again. I feel like God owes me that much.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
Heyyyy, naked guy in your kitchen, can i ask you a quick question about a legal situation in pb??
It’s amazing such a big dick belongs to such a boring guy
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