Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
Give me a few hours to remember what being sober feels like.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
He smells like ham and a lifetime of poor choices
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
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