WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
can't believe I ate straight coffee grounds to stay awake for that
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
turns out they were just sand fleas, not crabs.. thank you random mexican girl from padre who's name i can't pronounce
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
Let us bow our heads and pray that I don't throw up in the tub
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
On a scale from 1-10 how fucked up would it be to buy weed with my fafsa money?
It's a study aid
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize