i jus pukd everywherw but i took a showr, come cuddle
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
I woke up to a shot of jager next to my face. I felt bad for it so i drank it
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Well, that was my first dog walk of shame. Nothing says "I've got my life together" like an inside out shirt and a baggie full of dog shit.
We had a threesome and he gave us bottle rockets and a lamp for our apartment
Yeah but if you conceived a child on a park slide that would be pretty awesome
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
Randomize
