I pretty much can't stop smiling when I talk to you. Even when you talk about disease and infectious diarrhea.
I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
At least you're going to bed with all the teeth you woke up with
dude, there's a fucking musical in my head. it's fucking awesome being this high.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
You threw up with your ski mask on still.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Her next conquest seems to be stealing her ex-boyfriend's new girlfriend. Pretty sure everyone involved is totally OK with this.
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
If the world ends and i have no vodka please just kill me.
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
