Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
remember when I told you about my grandma asking me about my sex scars? Less comfortable than that
Just know I'm having fun but I still have my motor functions.
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
I can't put those talents on a resume
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
Also, fucking on half deflated air mattresses is a great full body work out.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I SWEAR TO ALL THAT IS HOLY I HAVE NEVER WIPED MY GENITALIA ON ANY TYPE OF EMERGENCY RESPONSE VEHICLE!!
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
