True but thats because hes a fetus.
awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
Anywhere you can eat green eggs and ham, you can have sex.
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
Telling me that I would make a great "occasional fuck" was not appreciated.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Sorry I wore your bra during sex last night
Is someone on their way here yet? I'm way too tweaked to be here alone
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
