i cant decide if i should go fuck j*** or keep watching real genius
Whyyyyy do my fingers smell like Chinese food.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
You should've come out last night, I need someone to explain why the bartender tried to strangle me...
Still want to know how you got back last night? Two Campus Security Officers carried you in around 430. Your pants were around your ankles.
I hate Sailor Jerry.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
it's your last night here, let's make it one we may or may not remember.
No no. Thank you. Killed multiple birds with one penis.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
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