i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I just woke up to a guy kissing me goodbye and leaving for class. I don't know where I am, don't have any clothes on, my underwear are gone, and the shoes I found with my dress aren't mine. He just walked in and gave me my phone. I was on my period. Come get me I will walk to the nearest intersection and wait.
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
I almost didn't wake up for my first day of work. The 3rd bottle of champagne was a mistake. And the 2nd bottle of wine after that was probably excessive
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
but real talk, he made 1 phone call last night and had someone bring us tacos at 3am so idk I might be inlove
Well, we all woke up in drag with no memory of why we were in drag. On the plus side, this shade of lipstick looks really good on me.
Wait are we really having an orgy on Tuesday?
In theory, it seemed like it would work.
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
In my life time, I want nothing more than to get a blow job while watching Space Jam.
Randomize
