U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
so he made me dinner last pm @whch point i askd if i could help out. he hands me his fucking laundry and asks me 2 do it
only you. it could only happen to you.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
You made me wash my hair in the kitchen sink while eating bay leaves
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
You have to wear the princess leia gold bikini every Sunday
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize