Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
We left around 4 AM after the stripper showed no mercy and dropped into a split on Matt's nose. Massive nosebleed.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just wrestled a cop. He won my shorts. I won my freedom. In fishnets and army boots. still headed to the party. would appreciate pants, but not necessary.
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
Is there a particular reason why everyone is now calling you Butt Doctor?
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
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