Ill do this for you.
You are a team player.
This is me making up for not putting my tongue inside you more.
we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
do you remember waking up from your blackout, kissing me ever so softly on the stomach, and saying "i love you bro. so much," then passing back out?
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
theres a new barista at starbuck holy fuck she's hot
i want to face-plant into her vagina
the japanese bartender dressed as a cowboy in assless chaps just told me i was too drunk for another shot
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
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