Whod you bang
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Being drunk at the hospital is better than i expected. I got to hide and play in the little kids waiting area. Btw no one is hurt
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
i just got hit by a door and im the one that said im sorry, yeah im drunk.
I fucked a 6 foot tall guy who has abs showing without even flexing... I am a wizard and I have magical powers.
Randomize
