Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Sometimes when I whip my dick out it looks REAL impressive. This, was NOT one of those times.
My boss just told me $1,000 at a six hour event wouldn't be worth her time. She makes $70k a yr. and apparently never learned multiplication.
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
I took it to a new level. I'm procrastinating taking my adderall. Hate finals week.
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
I'm thinking blowjobs and wheelchair sex should be part of any post-injury wellness plan.
Guy hitting on me at bar is guy who's Craigslist ad we laughed at the other night. Not even kidding.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
I finished my first whiskey and I'm waiting to have a second one in celebration when your pregnancy test comes back negative
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
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