Me too!
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
note to self: Never ask your girlfriend to have a 3some with your ex...
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
Attempting to teach the cat how to shake. I need a job.
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
You gave your boss a bj to get the safe employee of the month award?
You left a motherfucking bruise. ON MY TIT. How? How do you even. No.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
Randomize
