before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
this guy literally just gave me a gold star sticker for the "stellar" blow job i gave him. ashamed? i think not.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
Dude I gave him a bj because he was upset about the NFL draft, if that doesn't lock it down, i don't know what does
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
There seems no grander way to celebrate 420 than to smoke atop a mountain peak.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
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