just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
I found a picture of my kindergarten class. Now you can see whose peer pressure I succumbed to.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's ok. he made up for it by standing there and holding my purse while i made out with three guys at the bar. it was a pretty good night.
In between when I last wrote and now have screwed a Swiss guy on a hostel bathroom floor. Okay, real life?
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
Since when do you jog?
Since hot shirtless guy that lives across the street jogs
You need to somehow incorporate the phrase "these hoes ain't loyal" into your best man speech.
He fed me jello shota while i was sitting on the toilet and then he peed in the shower
He’s really fucking cute. Like, I want his penis in my mouth cute.
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