is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
Why is your signature on my underwear?
I know you're on vacation but you should know I just walk of shamed through a hotel lobby while leaving a threesome on Friday the 13th. Fuck superstition, I win.
He took a picture with a naked dude. I think he just walked out of that deep ginger closet.
Baked and hanging out with Al from Home Improvement's son. You can't make this shit up. Tuh-rippin balls
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
