It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
Your mom just threw up on me. Please come home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
My bra is still on the porch...I'm leaving it as a reminder to get my shit together.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.