can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
Joey just asked me if I ever got anything stuck in my vag.
was it embarrassing when you had to say yes?
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
It was worse than when we pepper-sprayed my dick. I feel mislead.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
So I'm not dead, but close call. I think I can handle one more bar.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
His parents bailed him out, the police said they found him on a curb trying to call people on his wallet, hahha. He had his wallet open to his ear callin people
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
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