I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
My dinner was lean cuisine and tequila. Aaaaaand I need a boyfriend.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Oh my god the guy at DQ just gave me the number 69 and winked at me
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
If you get me a sex toy for Christmas everyone in my family will question our relationship.
That's crazy. Wow that lady must be fucked up
Yeah I hope she's okay.
I'm still going to fuck her husband but I do hope she's okay.
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