don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
His sex texting was like a step by step guide to the most boring sex ever...
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
Then I realized I was alone sitting on the bathroom floor brushing my teeth at 2am laughing to myself.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
Sounds good. Stay safe. I'm kind of drunk in a Food 4 Less right now and I'm having the time of my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
If my penis could make facial expressions, it would constantly have a smile on.
He just looks like he'd be good in bed. He looks like he has a lot of anger built up in him and all I'm saying is that if he took out on my vagina I'm cool with that
Ben Franklin would totally be a furry.
You're smoking weed and checking Tumblr I take it?
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
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