Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they esentially rejected my mermaid threesome offer:(
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
Remember that time you puked in the middle of wendy's?
Yeah, why?
The staff still remembers me for cleaning it up. Thanks for the free frosty and fries
I JUST HAD TO SNORT THE REST OF MY BAG OF COKE BECAUSE THE BAG RIPPED IN THE WORK BATHROOM.
I'm guessing you feel amazing due to all the caps?
LETS GET THIS SHIT DONE. IM GONNA GET THIS SHIT DONE, FOREVER.
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
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