everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Woke up with 3 sports bras for underwear. Valiant effort drunk me.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Definitely worth waiting her kid to got to sleep when the first thing you hear once she's back is "I want you in my ass right now"
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
While I appreciate the pity sex (seriously, THANK YOU) we should not do it 3feet away from my ex when he's passed out next time. Awkward.
How do you politely tell someone to get out of your house in Russian
he just fucked me for my cheese..
I like the new guy, he keeps beer in the fridge.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
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