Im broke. I spend all my money on weed cigarettes alcohol and food. In that order. I cant even cut one of those because you know it'd be food. I already stopped getting my nails done just so i could support my bad habits.
yeah. you were just sitting there watching transformers, caressing your toaster.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
Currently standing on top of my parents leather couch with no pants on playing helicoptor with my penis. You?
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
you can't tell me you didn't shit your pants I saw them in the trash can by the bathroom.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Yeah i like want to be friends with him. And if we have sex in the physics library well thats fine with me
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