Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
On your way out, lock the front door. And by lock the front door, I mean find the door handle, reattach it, and then lock it.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
Its ok. I handled the situation with grace and class. lol jk i got shitfaced and fucked his roomate.
Your engaged. Stop telling guys you will sit on their face. They don't always know your kidding.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
The prescription the hospital gave me for pain and nausea doubles for my hangovers... Maybe I'll hit up the ER more often
He stumbled out of their hotel room and yelled, "I'M ON A STATEWIDE TOUR. I'VE BEEN IN KENTUCKY AND OKLAHOMA."
Randomize
