K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
I'm hoping you can explain why I woke up with what I believe is pumpkin pie all over my body
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I walked down to the adult beverage store and got two bottles of jim beam and s shooter of crwon black label because we didn't have any Tylenol
Fuck that must be a crazy sunburn.
Please just tell me how ugly she was so I can bask in the diminishingly small reassurance that might give me
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
I can't decide which is the most disgusting: emily having sex on the stairwell of a frat, michelle shaving her vagina with a razor she found in a frat bathroom, or me getting fingered on the dance floor by some rando. opinions?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
Randomize
