Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
Guys, I'm sleeping in the BOYNTON LAUNDRY ROOM. if you can, come let me out in the morning as I have no keys. I might be in the study room possibly. DON'T FORGET. I will be trapped
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Yes but that point is quickly negated bc u should never have to search more than one room to find your underwear.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
hey dude my crackhead idol just taught me a great way to tie shoes
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Randomize
