Just be blunt and say drink from my dick
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
fuck that its my house. if i want to take 1 bite out of the chicken & leave the rest i fucking will. suck my dick
He tried to introduce me to one of his friends that kept looking at me and I said "OH NO! I can't do this shit anymore!!" It was like I had a vision of what drunk me would've done in about 20 minutes.
my life is turning into trapped in the closet at way too fast a speed for me to feel comfortable.
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
my liver is dry heaving
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Randomize
