My hair reeks of homosexuality.
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
I'm giving up shame for lent. Here come the best 40 days and nights of my life.
Yeaaah, so cabbie laughed at me, and said, "rough nite? Let me find you some music" . apparently OPP is the appropriate ride of shame soundtrack.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Now the circle is complete. Just interviewed a guy who was a higher up member of the team I worked for in my job before this place
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
I will consider it. I need to determine if ogling him is worth almost certain death via zipline.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
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