Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
She looks like an uncircumcised penis in a hat.
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
Oh my god it's like Minesweeper. I can tell there's sex in three of the four rooms, but which one is the safe one?
This whole night would have been avoided if the liquor store had air heads
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Responsible roommate: 1. Someone who takes a huge shit at work so as not to clog the toilet at home.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
that is our friendship pylon, do not lose it
fuck you.
DO NOT LOSE IT
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
What a weekend. It started with me realizing i might not be straight and ended with me spraining my foot.
Randomize
