...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
How did you get the entire couch up on it's side and into the bathroom?
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
You know it was a challenge blowing out the candles. It was hard to think of a wish, while drunk, with a concussion.
Around noon tomorrow come looking for me. I'll be on Mill wearing whatever clothes I haven't lost yet. DO NOT REPLY. DO NOT ASK QUESTIONS. JUST DO IT.
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
Wearing my one sleeve dress...thought you'd like to know I shaved ONE armpit lol
One of my tenants at my fourplex that I own gave me a massive bag of severely dank pot and a brick of cocaine because she didn't have the cash to pay the rent. She might just be my favorite tenant!
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