"it" just moved
Soap is not a condiment
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
you were drinking a pitcher of what you called "16 loko" and making everybody guess what the secret ingredient was
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
She's cute. And her snoring noises remind me of the incidental music from Jaws.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
downside - we got stuck at the intersection before the santa clause parade started and had to wait for it to end. upside - i got frontrow seats and a blow job to the santa clause parade.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
There's wine in the fridge here. You could leave school and we could get day drunk.
That's my favorite drunk.
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
Randomize
