Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
my vag is singing 'hurts so good' by john mellencamp
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
There was a half eaten cheeseburger on my coffee table. Guess I made it to McDonald's.
I just got head while watching air force one. Harrison ford would be proud.
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
On another note I never thought having a drug addicted stalker would prove useful
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Babe, I'm gunna be straight with you. When you act like a dick it makes me regret not fucking my manager last week.
She could hold her breath for a long time. Best underwater blowjob ever.
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