I think, one-on-one, Paul Rudd could be very threatening in like a REALLY good way.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
My brother and I both agreed that your boobs are fake.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
Can't decide if it was more awkward buying sheets together or disposing of them afterwards
Adderal can only make me focus so much. Your ass is stronger than my medicine. Congratulations.
Also so weird my phone cracked after I repeatedly threw it at the ground as hard as possible
I threw my shoes out of frustration and walked home barefoot... can you help me find my shoes in the morning
The box said 94% effective prevention of pregnancy if used correctly but God knows I’m not gonna use it right so let’s adjust that to like a 70%
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