So they call this "a walk of shame" but fuck that...this walk is fantastic. What kind of debbie downer came up with that name?
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
Seriously? What part of meeting at Oktoberfest while I'm wearing a dirndl, double fisting, and making out with random guys screams "i'm girlfriend material"?!
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Exactly, there's no such thing as commitment at foam n' glow
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
Step 1: chug a red bull vodka with no ice Step 2: chase that with a shot of wild turkey Step 3: chase that with a shot of tequila
Step 4: your drunk
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
