My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
I just ran into the couch, vagina first.
I hope you got dinner out of it
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
The intern claims someone glued plastic eyeballs to his penis last night. He going to show everyone in the conference room at 3pm. There is a $5 cover charge.
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
We established that I was in 5th grade when she was in her final year of grad school. Her daughter is also in 5th grade.
Not sorry that my walk of shame this morning was barefoot on my scooter.
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
Then you guys just all showered together...?
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
