My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
I seriously just caught my 15 year old little sister with a positive pregnancy test coming out of the bathroom. Honest to God.
I have a coat hanger and a baseball bat. Her choice.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Def just hooked up with my brother's senior prom date in his bed. Does that make me the worst brother ever?
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
some how during sex we caught an ENTIRE pillow on fire. A WHOLE PILLOW.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
That moment when your mom is so drunk she makes you get out of bed to lay in her bed because she thinks it feels like sleeping on a marshmallow peep....
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize