dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
we couldnt find her phone in the morning so i called it and found it under the bed. my name came up as 'regret'
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
just saw a couple drunkenly stumble over to the family planning aisle of Walgreens. inspiring.
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Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Also I think I'm starting to get calluses on my hands from my level of sexual activity
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
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I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
I'm with jana at walgreens picking out penis rings.... Did you know they sell vibrators at walgreens? Wtf?
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