I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
do people really wait til 5 oclock to start drinking in real life?
I found them in the kitchen microwaving bottle rockets chanting U.S.A U.S.A U.S.A
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
Officially conquered sex on my couch with my dad asleep in the next room
I like how you say "conquered" as if that was your sole mission in life
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
You would think a husband, a boyfriend, and a vibrator would be enough. But sadly it's not
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
I woke up handcuffed to a bed wearing nothing but an army belt. Does this count as thanking our country?
I'm wearing men's underwear
I don't know what to do with that information...
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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