my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
Its 6am. Um if my mom for some reasons asks, you stopped by my house around ten and had some wine with me. She is concerned I drank a whole bottle by myself. Woke me at 6am to interrogate..Thank god my pounding head thinks fast.
PS We had chips too. She is less concerned about the whereabouts of the chips but still a good lie always needs detail.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
and i looked up. we had an audience...
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
My legs have surpassed "hairy" and entered the territory of "furry". Maybe I should just suck it up and shave already
No now I'm curious!
What're you gonna do with the rest of your night?
Probably watching cooking videos and fantasizing about pie
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
It was all going good until I realized she was wearing underwear with a butt flap. Mission aborted.
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
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