No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
God, you're like boner-b-gone
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
I'm at home, drinking with my cat. While this is an enjoyable lifestyle, other plans are preferable.
I think the solution to your phobia is an open relationship with your dildo. about the same responsibility as a pet rock
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
You put on a bike helmet, yelled "doesn't matter fuck it" then punched a stick the fire
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
The fact that the praying hands are in my top emojis defines how 2016 is going so far
I just met a drunk old lady with a bedazzled life alert alarm around her neck. I love casinos
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