Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
I feel like our lives always have been and always will be a never ending drunken rampage full of pregnancy scares and lost brain cells
tell your brother to quit sending me his dick pics what am i going to do with them print them out and shove them up my ass???
I put his pb&j sandwich in my bra and never looked back
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I just want you to make me second guess my worth as a human. Is that too much to ask?
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
I can tell that I'm high when listening to celine dion becomes such a life changing experience
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