I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Whoever decided it was a good idea to sell 40's at a bar with life-sized jenga deserves a nobel prize.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Some guy just rode an office chair down my street, I hope he comes back so I can give him my number.
I woke up and found a doughnut on our front porch. It's not sketchy though. More like a gift from the gods.
We need to figure out what we are doing for halloween asap. I'm not going out like a punk ass bitch burger king again this year.
Um went out in San Francisco last night and ignored someone hitting on me. So they bit my arm. Lmfao PLEASE TELL ME THIS ISNT THE SINGLE LIFE
He went down on me to the national anthem being sung by Jordan sparks. It was very patriotic of him
Sexting gets boring after a while. I'm eating a sandwich right now and googling 'sexting ideas' and just copy/pasting lines.
It's a good sandwich though.
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
You were yelling at them from the passenger seat saying you wanted your chicken for free because they couldn't prove it was from kentucky
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
