I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just drank the rest of the vodka . Btw why did we put candy corn in it?
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
You better be Eskimo Brother-ing the FUCK out of tonight right now. Long distance 'balls deep' high five
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Gonna open a taco bell in colorado. Millions bro.
I miss the "How many Grindr hits can I get while performing in an elementary school?" game.
The bottle of Jameson may have been a bit aggressive for a Sunday cookout.
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
so like
i may have gotten a little bit of blood in the charging port of my phone
Randomize