I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Good cause the way I see it, we are down to DAYS left of college so we should have as much naked fun as possible. And Jenga really facilitates that.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
By the way I peed in a mug last night cause you were in the bathroom and im pretty sure it is still in the kitchen.
I did coke with the Royal Navy last night. God save the queen.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
I just want orgasms and emotional validation. Is that too much to ask?
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
I’d clean the kitchen before making food. Mark “rang in the New Year” with some rando in there last night
Randomize
